When to Use “Essere” vs. “Avere” in Italian (Without Overthinking It)
Confused about when to use "essere" vs. "avere" in Italian? This guide breaks it down simply—perfect for learners in San Francisco, Oakland, Berkeley & San Jose.
Introduction: The Verb Dilemma Every Italian Learner Faces
You’ve just started learning Italian. You can say a few phrases, maybe even introduce yourself. And then you run head-first into the infamous past tense and find yourself asking: wait... do I use essere or avere here?
You're not alone. Choosing between essere and avere ("to be" vs. "to have") is one of the most common struggles for learners of Italian. At first glance, it seems straightforward—until it isn’t. You hear phrases like ho mangiato (I ate), but also sono andato (I went), and wonder: why not ho andato? What makes one verb use avere and another use essere?
For English speakers, this can be especially confusing. In English, we mostly use "have" to form past tenses: I have eaten, I have gone, I have arrived. But in Italian, some of those same sentences might use essere instead. Suddenly, you’re not just learning vocabulary—you’re trying to untangle a grammar rule that doesn’t exist in your native language.
Add to this the challenge of gender agreement, reflexive verbs, and verbs of movement, and many learners start to feel overwhelmed. But the good news? You don’t need to be a grammar expert to get this right. What you need is a practical, pattern-based approach—one that actually makes sense in everyday situations.
If you're reading this in the San Francisco Bay Area—maybe sipping a cappuccino in Berkeley, waiting for BART in Oakland, or commuting from San Jose—you probably don’t have time to memorize endless verb lists. You want clarity, confidence, and something that feels intuitive. Maybe you're planning a trip to Italy. Maybe you're learning to better connect with your family or community. Or maybe you just love the musical rhythm of Italian and want to speak it with authenticity.
At Polyglottist Language Academy, we believe language should be both logical and fun. Our students don’t just memorize; they connect the dots. That’s why this guide is more than a grammar lesson. It’s a simple roadmap to help you recognize patterns, trust your ear, and build confidence with two of the most important verbs in the Italian language.
Let’s get started!
Step One: Know What These Verbs Mean
Before diving into past tenses, let’s take a moment to fully understand what essere and avere mean on their own. These are two of the most important verbs in the Italian language, and they serve as the foundation for many other grammatical structures.
Essere = to be
Avere = to have
You’ll use these verbs constantly, not just in isolation but to form complex tenses, expressions, and even idioms.
In the present tense, they work like you'd expect:
Io sono felice = I am happy
Io ho un cane = I have a dog
You’ll also see them in expressions like:
Sei stanco? = Are you tired?
Abbiamo fame. = We are hungry.
But the confusion starts when we use them as helping verbs to form the passato prossimo (the Italian past tense). That’s where the rules start to shift and surprise many learners.
Step Two: Use “Avere” With Most Verbs
Here’s the good news: most Italian verbs use avere in the past tense.
That means that, more often than not, your default helping verb will be avere. This simplifies things tremendously, especially when you’re just starting out.
Use avere with:
Transitive verbs (verbs that take a direct object):
Ho mangiato la pizza = I ate the pizza
Hai visto il film? = Did you see the movie?
Abbiamo finito il lavoro = We finished the work
Common actions or experiences:
Ho parlato con Marco = I spoke with Marco
Abbiamo viaggiato molto = We traveled a lot
Hanno giocato a calcio = They played soccer
These examples show how avere is used to describe a wide range of past actions. From eating to watching, finishing to traveling, avere is your go-to helper verb.
Easy Rule:
If you can ask what? or whom? after the verb and get an answer, use avere.
This is because avere connects with verbs that require a direct object—someone or something receiving the action. When in doubt, think: "Can I answer this with a noun?" If yes, it's probably avere.
Bonus Tip:
Many learners find that avere is the more "action-oriented" verb when describing tasks, interactions, and activities. It's great for describing what you did, saw, said, or made during the day. Think of it as the past-tense workhorse of Italian grammar.
Step Three: Use “Essere” for Movement and States
Now the tricky part: some verbs use essere instead of avere in the past tense. These tend to be about movement or change of state.
Use essere with:
Verbs of motion:
Sono andato a casa = I went home
Siamo usciti ieri = We went out yesterday
Verbs of state/change:
Maria è nata a Milano = Maria was born in Milan
Luca è morto nel 1995 = Luca died in 1995
The “House of Essere” Trick
Imagine a house: the verbs that use essere are the ones that describe going in, going out, going up, going down, being born, dying, arriving, and leaving.
Here are some:
nascere (to be born)
morire (to die)
andare (to go)
venire (to come)
arrivare (to arrive)
partire (to leave)
entrare (to enter)
uscire (to exit)
salire (to go up)
scendere (to go down)
BONUS: Reflexive Verbs Always Use Essere
Mi sono svegliato tardi = I woke up late
Ti sei divertita? = Did you have fun?
Step Four: Adjust the Past Participle with “Essere”
Here’s a detail learners often forget: with essere, the past participle must agree in gender and number with the subject.
Luca è andato (masculine singular)
Maria è andata (feminine singular)
Luca e Marco sono andati (masculine plural)
Anna e Lucia sono andate (feminine plural)
With avere, no agreement is needed (unless you use a direct object pronoun, but that’s for another day).
Step Five: Practice with Real Sentences
Sentences with avere:
Ho comprato una bicicletta.
Abbiamo guardato la TV.
Hai mangiato il gelato?
Sentences with essere:
Sono arrivato alle otto.
Siamo partiti presto.
Lei è diventata famosa.
Polyglottist Tip: Don’t Memorize, Just Listen
The best way to internalize this rule isn’t memorizing charts—it’s listening to how people speak. Watch Italian movies, listen to podcasts, and read stories. Native speakers will guide your intuition over time.
Why It Matters for Travelers and Beginners
Whether you're strolling through the markets of Florence or ordering espresso in Rome, using the correct helping verb makes you sound more natural and grammatically correct. In cities like Milan or Bologna, the locals will notice and appreciate your accuracy.
In the Bay Area, we understand cultural diversity—and language is a huge part of it. By learning Italian correctly, you’re not just preparing for a trip. You’re connecting with people, culture, and community in a deeper way.
Learn Italian in the San Francisco Bay Area
At Polyglottist Language Academy, we make Italian easy, engaging, and personalized. We offer in-person classes in Berkeley.
We also offer online lessons to fit any schedule.
Our classes cover:
Grammar made easy
Conversation practice
Travel vocabulary
Cultural etiquette
And of course... essere vs. avere
👉 Enroll in Italian classes today and start speaking with confidence.
FAQs: “Essere” vs. “Avere” in Italian
Q: Is there a full list of verbs that use essere?
A: Yes, but you don’t need to memorize them all. Stick with the motion/change rule for now.
Q: Can one verb use both essere and avere?
A: Rarely. Some verbs do change meaning depending on which auxiliary is used (like passare), but context usually makes it clear.
Q: How can I practice this easily?
A: Try translating simple past-tense stories and checking your answers with a tutor or language app.
Q: What if I make a mistake?
A: Italians will still understand you! Mistakes are part of the learning process.
Q: Should I worry about agreement with essere right away?
A: Not at the beginning, but try to notice it in writing and repeat it when speaking.